ten fingers and ten toes

i spent so much time working on a spreadsheet today at the office that i actually started seeing stripes. white, glowy, ghostly stripes where there were none. not okay. thank god i finished building the worksheet (complete with complex and crazy formulas) so that i won't ever have to spend hours in front of it again.

the Bachelor (of which i am watching my first and only 3 minutes of this season, seriously) just said "she's going to have her own Pretty Woman experience today." soooo he's gonna dress her up like a broke-down hooker with a bad pink wig in 80s chic street walkin' wear only to bring her to Rodeo and buy her classy lady clothing to dress her up so his rich friends don't know he is paying for sex? sounds like a fun day. maybe if her laugh was as infectious as Julia's or the bachelor looked more like good old Richard i'd watch for a little longer. alas, he's no Gere.

number nine

the title of this post will only be humorous to those members of my immediate family, which i cannot fully explain. it's just another one of those random sayings that i grew up hearing and repeating, but not having any clue they came from movies or books or random bits of pop culture. watching Dana Carvey on SNL as the "church lady," seeing movies like "Raising Arizona," and reading books like "All Creatures Great and Small" shattered the image i had of my parent's comedic abilities. i found out they were just ripping off funny from the greats. it's fine, but it was weird to hear things i had grown up knowing from their original and previously unknown sources. my family, just like all normal ones, is strange. and now to watch "Raising Arizona" for some bedtime laughs.

8's great

playing my itunes on shuffle while i shower has illustrated just how diverse my musical taste is. in one shower and subsequent jam session i heard this interesting list of gems (all of which i totally dug and sang along to):
I Miss You - Dreamstreet
There's a Good Reason These Tables are Labeled Honey, You Just Haven't Thought of it Yet - Panic! at the Disco
Life is Wonderful - Jason Mraz
This City is Contagious - The Cab
We've Got it Goin' On - Backstreet Boys
Que Pasa? - Juanes
Panic Attack - Atmosphere
Some Fantastic - Barenaked Ladies

and that's just eight of the songs...
being eclectic is much more fun, i've decided.

seventh heaven

i'm such a swingin' single. my big friday night plans? curl up in bed with Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. re-reading the books is creating very mixed emotions. i had forgotten so many of the little details since i read them for the first and only time so long ago, and i love putting the pieces back together working my way towards the end of the story. but watching the movies right after i finish each book is actually filling me with anger. despite my strong and enduring love for Rupert Grint and all that is Ronald Weasley, the movies are sorely lacking the depth of the books. which is only this apparent when compared side-by-side. i still like the movies for what they are, but the large chunks of story-line, entire characters and character growth and development that are missing hurt me. Hermione is much more annoying in the books, yet despite it all Ron still loves her. Snape is much more curiously allied, it's a lot easier to believe his loyalty to Dumbledore and the side of right reading the books. poor Winky is completely erased and the entire story line of Barty Crouch, Jr. is much less sordid. oh, and where the hell is Pigwidgeon? i want that adorable little ridiculous owl to flit around and hoot madly. oh, well. on to the Order of the Phoenix...my fave.

sexy six

Jersey Shore season 3. that is all i have to say. because that is the only thing that happened today that is worth sharing. not only did the premiere include compulsory bitch fighting between JWoww/Snooks/everybody awesome and Sammi/Ronnie, there was already some hot tubbin', unexpected newbie nudity, adorableness from Vinny, the duck phone and so much more. no matter what is going on in my life, i can tell you that for the duration of this season of Jersey Shore i will be always be found on my couch Thursday nights with my favorite band of guidos, guidettes and juiceheads.

party of 5

for some reason when this song came on during my shower shuffle session tonight i was super into it. i mean, the Chili Peppers are always my loves, but this was totally my jam in the moment. also, who doesn't love when a band uses words like "lexicon" in their lyrics. the lyrics for your enjoyment:

"Save the Population"

History's so strong
History's so strong
History's so strong
History's so strong

Sing another drinking song the honkytonk will do
Making another breaking bone your favorite ingenue
This the distant dawn
This the distant dawn

I put my cards upon the table
I do this because I am able
One picks his broken down devotion
I threw my pistol in the ocean
Eyes wide with revelation
Shine at the police station
And when the verdict comes round
I'm sure that you will go down

Stay all night
we'll save the population
Stay all night
we'll save the population
Stay all night
we'll save the population
Stay all night
we'll save the population

(Instrumental Bridge)

Pistol and its pawn
Sell it to the lexicon
A pistol and its pawn
Blood and border lines be drawn

Take another bottle down the brothel and the shrew
Make another awful sound, a rather gothic brew
History's so strong
History's so strong

I put my cards upon the table
I do this because I am able
One picks his broken down devotion
I threw my pistol in the ocean
Eyes wide with revelation
Shine at the police station
And when the verdict comes round
I'm sure that you will go down

Stay all night we'll save the population....(x10)

four Loko

Snooki and the Situation both wrote books. just read that and soak it in for a second. okay, now think about this: they "wrote" these books, but someone whose brain cells haven't been burned by excessive tanning actually did the putting together of the words part. SHADOW WRITER. i seriously think i missed my calling. how does one get that gig? sure, it's a thankless job and you probably get paid crap, but you get to spend quality time trying to make coherent sentences out of the ridiculousness spouting from the mouths of geniuses like Snooks and Sitch. if you know me, you know my love for all things Jersey Shore. and this love isn't a fake love, or a mocking love. i have legitimately formed bonds with these GTL'd, poofed and juiced up guidos and guidettes. (some more so than others, sure. but nobody actually likes Ronnie and Sammi.) with the impending premiere of season 3 (THURSDAY!!) i am overcome by excitement. i have missed my adorable trainwrecks and can't wait to spend a little more time with them. but, seriously, if you know how i can get in on the ground floor of JWoww's literary debut hit a sister up. or, maybe Vinny and i can get together to write a romance novel, if you know what i mean. shoot, gotta go. it's T-SHIRT TIIIIIIIIIMMMMEEEEE!

i have a train boyfriend. he's hot and has gorgeous dark chocolate hair. his name, you ask? oh, i don't know it. or anything about him, other than that he takes the Purple line to Davis every morning and his office has casual fridays. someday, my friends, i will accidentally bump into him as we sway with the motion of the racing train car. i just have to wait until i'm not sick. and maybe until the weather is warmer so there's less coat fluff in the mix. also i have to think of a line. preferably one that's not creepy or dumb. this may take a while...

3 strikes, baby

now that i have my big-girl real-world job i have more time to do origami. thank god, because i thought my paper folding days were over. or, at the very least significantly decreased in number. but then i realized that working lunch coverage shifts at the reception desk was specifically designed to give me origami therapy time. people are always really impressed by my frogs and boxes. and boxes of frogs. so what if frogs and boxes are the only things i can make?

thank you, Leslie Knope, for reminding me how great The Phantom Tollbooth is. i seriously need to pick up a copy and give that sucker a read. it won't be the same without you reading it to me filibuster style in a town hall forum, but giving it a go all on my own will still be a great reminiscence.

take 2

sometimes the immaturity of people you think you knew is astounding and disappointing. come on, people. we are college graduates! we are in our twenties, not middle school. get with the groove. i'm not going into specifics here, because airing my personal dirty laundry in a public forum is not the adult way to handle it. i'm over it and moving on. vent session: complete.

there are so many things i love about my apartment, my building and my management company. seriously, these people are fantastic. my maintenance man, Mike, is the cutest Boston Irish guy, and so sweet. the guy who showed my my apartment two months ago, Andy, is a goofy baby-face and the literal embodiment of the term "goob." my cleaning lady, whose name i sadly can never remember, is an adorable little hispanic woman with a constantly smiling face. and damn if she doesn't keep this place spotless and smelling delightful. so when i went down to do three giant loads of laundry to discover they give us free laundry during the holidays it was just a cherry on top of my adoration sundae. you can bet your sweet behind that i washed my comforter, too.

let's reset the count to 1 again, friends

Ronald Weasley has stolen my heart. he's such a ginger stud. some haters may say that's an oxymoron. they'd argue that flame-headed folk can't be sex gods, but i beg to differ. i have known more than a couple attractive red-heads in my day and Rupert Grint is just the celebrity embodiment of such fiery hotness. sure he's goofy and dopey, but he's also a loyal and courageous sidekick, battling Death Eaters, Snatchers and the Dark Lord with the best of them. plus, he's got good taste in ladies. Hermione Granger's a stone-cold fox. i'm jealous of his enduring affection for her, but i am content to sit back and watch him, wand a-blazing, fight for the good of the wizarding world, just so long as i can see him shirtless a couple times. oh, and don't get me started on the accent. i'm getting weak in the knees just thinking about it. i may have to re-watch a couple more Harry Potter movies tonight just to get my fix.

living alone i have realized that i talk to myself a lot. like hold entire conversations out loud with my own person. growing up an only child i often had to entertain myself and play alone, so talking out loud wasn't really strange. but now that i'm an adult and i discuss mundane everyday things like what i will have for dinner or what my plan for the evening is with myself, it's a little bizarre. thank god i'm not a loner. i mean, i have friends and spend quite a considerable amount of time with them, i chat on the phone regularly with my mother, and i spend all day making perfectly normal conversation with my co-workers. i'm not starved for attention by any means. so i guess what it comes down to is, either i really shouldn't be alone ever, or i find myself quite the entertaining individual. i like what i've got to say and i want to hear myself say it. i'm not sure which of those conclusions makes me sound less strange, but i think they are both equally true. i love having my own time and space, but i really am such a people person that being alone for long stretches of time (like these past few days when i've been sick) is too much for me to handle. and i do like who i am and what i've got to share with the world, which i see as a silver lining of this whole "i talk to myself constantly" thing. i think i'm a pretty great gal, and that's all right by me.